the chari blog

My crazy life.

2010-08-26T21:17:00.000-04:00

WorshipJunkie Media ( my day job ) and The Fast21 Initiative have currently moved into our own office and my life has just gotten so much busier if that's even possible. Between work, The upcoming event, serving at my home church, and my everyday life as a wife, I have found I am taking WAY more naps.

It's amazing all that God is doing. For example...

1. This weekend (29th) Celebration Church will be singing a new song at Midtown and Orange Park that I co-wrote with Dougie Fowler, and Lindsey Vartanian. It's called "for the glory of you". I am beyond words, beyond humbled.

2. The Fast21 Event is going to be life changing. Please make sure you get your tickets either online, through me, or coming by the office (4519 Beach Blvd, Jax, Fl. 32207. We are in build 4200 in rm. 104)

3. Our Fast21 tees will be here next week and im awestruck at finally seeing this come to pass. Excited isn't a good enough word to explain how I feel about it!

and that's just a few things....SO PLEASE make sure to spread the word and get your tickets. Hope to see you guys soon.

Chari.

Fast21 Launch : Get Ready

2010-07-29T13:57:00.004-04:00

I wake up every morning and say OMG I can't believe this is happening, Please God don't let me screw this up. I feel like maybe I should stop every couple steps, bow down and perhaps light something on fire as a sacrifice. I've never been more humbled or in awe then I am right now...

I've decided to not have a CD Release party but instead we've decided to do a benefit Concert and Launch FAST21 Apparel instead. My reasoning is, I don't want an evening where it's all about me.

So here is the skinny:

WHEN: Friday, September 10th, 2010
WHERE: Deep Blue @ the Jacksonville Landing, in Downtown Jacksonville
TIME: 7 p.m.
COST: $15 Every single cent that is brought in from ticket sales will go directly to the A21 Campaign!

WHAT IS THE NIGHT GONNA LOOK LIKE?
Well its gonna be awesome.... We will have a DJ!!! Its a secret I won't say who is gonna do it, but its gonna be awesome! There will also be a concert, featuring that amazing Corey Kilgannon, Lindsey Carter, and of course me with some more of my talented friends! We will also have representatives from some local foundations that are doing incredible things to combat human sex trafficking. Get ready for a night of music, art, and Jesus...

Each artist will have merch ( music and such ) for you guys to buy as well as the FAST21 Tshirt that will Launch that night!

love you guys,
Chari

Dream Big. Love God.

2010-06-14T02:19:00.002-04:00

ONE:

When I was 17 I felt the call upon my life lead me towards music. I knew music ministry would be part of my life forever and in the last 10 years I've successfully released 2 full length indie records, 1 EP, and a live album....and well, POTENTIALLY This week my first nationally released album hits Itunes.

TWO:

When I was 21, I felt compelled to write a book. I wrote 7 chapters before my PC crashed and the book was erased. This year God gave me my dream back and the book is completed, and I currently have them printed and boxed in my office ready to share with the world.

THREE:

I always new I'd be part of a church that was world changing. I knew I was called to the Lord through Worship, and being part of a worship experience that was changing lives was something I hoped i'd one day be a part of....and today I can say I am. Celebration church spans the globe, feeds orphans, restores girls that have been rescued from sex trafficking, and on a weekly basis I watch people give there life to Christ in massive numbers.

....God has been so faithful, and now that I am humbly walking in the dreams I asked God for in my youth, my heart and my mind cannot fathom what He has in store for me in the next season...I feel a bit like David did as he brought the arc of the covenant towards the city. I feel as if every couple steps I should stop, and bow to my knees and thank God for this moment, for this season. And for the Grace to live this out...

One of the first worship leaders I really loved, when I first started playing music was, Rita Springer. And this moment her song Created to worship fills my heart.

I am your sacrifice
I am your offering
I was created to worship you
There's nothing I could bring
That would mean more then this one thing
I was created to worship you.

You are all I have
All I have is you
You are all I am
All I am is you

Whatever you ask of me
There's no one I'd rather be
Then one created to worship you
In all that comes my way
Poverty fame or pain
I was created to worship you

Without you there's nothing Lord
Now and forevermore
I was created to worship you

In Awe,
Chari

JUNE VLOG!!!

2010-06-08T21:47:00.003-04:00

Um why am I an absolute weirdo!!!??? ENJOY the epic fails and crazy JUNE ramblings.

My Current View...

2010-05-30T23:01:00.001-04:00

I've learned to love the rain since it has been my residence for the last couple years. The storms of life have been so constant that I've learned to actually see the beauty in the clouds, and dance in the rain.

But I will say nothing has ever been more beautiful then my current view. The rain has slowly stopped and I am able to see the light of the sun peak over the mountain range I have been fighting for so long. And even if the rain starts up again, I've seen hope rise out my despair. Pastor Stovall has been preaching about Suffering Well. I can't say that in the last couple years, and in my sadness that I suffered well. Sadly it wasn't until the end that I truly felt peace, and began to understand that all I'd walked through was nothing compared to what God was trying to ready me for. My hope and my prayer is that what is facing me now, this call, this mandate I feel pressing on my heart strings will be something I walk through with joy and peace. And that Christ is in the rain, and fire along with me. What a beautiful revelation of Christ's Faithfulness, that even in the fire and even in my darkest days that his whisper was and is my hope and his love was and is my light.

I am excited about all God is doing in this next season, I just hope I'm ready and willing to recognize him, and be flexible no matter the task, no matter the journey.

Dreaming Big, and Loving God.
Chari

The Book has arrived!!!!

2010-05-24T23:19:00.000-04:00

Okay so im sure most people are like what? I thought you were releasing an Album?

Well I am...

but I wrote a book to accompany the album. Its called "Who I am" and it is the stories, and lyrics behind the album as well as 15 day Devotional. The book is something I've always felt compelled to do and never did. The albums were always easy to complete but the book has been something I ran from for quite a while...but not any more. They've arrived and are ready to given out with the albums....

May 2010 Vlog

2010-05-23T16:36:00.001-04:00

What a month this has been...

2010-05-22T22:27:00.005-04:00

Its not even finished yet, but May 2010 has been life changing. I will break it down in 3 major things that have happened or that I have experienced thus far...

1. The Shine Conference
here are some amazing things I learned at Shine.

-God is not into who's better. God is into who's obedient (Lisa Young)

- Live for Glory or Die Trying (Kerri Weems)

- My Life is a vapor in eternity, and I need to live it with an eternity perspective. ( Christine Caine)

This comment was made after the story that birthed the Fast21 Initiative. I can't just live my life and worry about my own selfish agenda when there is so much to do.

- I am not a pond, a body of water made to bask in the presence of the son. I am a river made to flow out and touch the world. ( Mercy Lokulutu )

Honorable mention I met an amazing worship Leader named Sandra Ruiz, from Celebration Austin who totally spoke into my life! Love you friend...

2. Fast21
Shine really messed me up and after hearing Christine Cain speak about human trafficking my heart broke beyond repair. The story she told, made my soul ache and I new i could not live this life without doing something. Below is a video of the story I heard. and http://fast21.org is the result.

3. The Music
*** The album is almost done!!!! Its getting mastered as I write this and will be available for download we believe by the first 2 weeks in JUNE!!!!!

***Did I mention the book is Printed and Ready!!!!

*** LISTEN TO THE SINGLE HERE

Also there is another announcement concerning the music I can't share Yet....but its gonna be pretty major!!!

May brings flowers for sure.

Dream Big. Love God.
Chari

The Single

2010-05-16T01:50:00.000-04:00

What if i told you that the album is actually almost done...like for real this time. What? Don't believe me? Okay....well listen to the single called free featuring the amazing Lindsey Vartanian.

My hands look old....

2009-01-15T18:36:00.001-05:00

My hands look old. I am not generally an "old person", i'm only 27....

But last night i looked at my hands and just thought "wow, my hands look old".

Life has been at times very difficult and other times life has been like a sunny day,

but lately i believe my hands reflect the last season or year of my life...

One of my goals for the next 21 days is to read more. Whether my Bible, or one of my books collecting dust....just to read. Today I read Ephesians, and Ephesians 4 moved me....."Live a life worthy of your calling" it said...

Live my life worthy of my calling....wow....I pray for that. I hope for that. I look at my hands and I wondered have these hands played my guitar worthy of my calling. Has my voice sang or said words worthy of my calling.....

I hope so. I really hope so.

Part 2_Passion has no halfway mark : [The Wait]

2010-04-22T11:00:00.009-04:00

I am pretty sure its in Superman II where Superman struggles with the life given to him, and the result is he gives his powers back. He just wants to be normal, ( what he assumes normal is any way).

I certainly can say I have at times felt this way, and even as I write this I can honestly say more than not I feel like this...

I can't fly, and I can't see through walls but I have this call on my life that at times has felt like I am wrapped in chains. I was reminded of what Paul said, ( Romans 1:1) that he was a slave to Christ and I definitely have felt at times like a slave and not a thriving individual.

But being that I am a problem solver, to a fault at times, this latest realization has caused me to trace my steps back and evaluate what has led me to this feeling of wanting to give it back, and become what I perceive as normal. And all things lead back to one thing...

I struggle with the wait, and in the wait I have bypassed why God has me there.

the end result ... my heart has grown weary.

The Wait.

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. Prov. 13:12

Not sure what your waiting on, but i've been waiting for some major stuff. And it seems like no matter how long I wait, the only thing that awaits me is more waiting laced in trial after trial. Sadly in this waiting room, I at times have lost my vision, my hope, and my sense of self.

I've been in and out of hospitals and waiting rooms my whole life it seems , and everyone can agree waiting in a Dr.'s office and watching people get called in when you've been waiting longer is SUPER annoying. Especially when your hypothetically bleeding to death and they seem to only have a scratch! ...*sigh ...story of my life.

negative aspects of the wait

1. Waiting in general sucks.
2. Waiting rooms usually are smelly and muggy, and a depressing shade of 1983 baby blue (but in my spiritual waiting room its just uncomfortable, and makes me wanna cry, and permanently sit on my couch)
3. Waiting hurts, and stretches us in places we never realized we needed to be stretched.

positive aspects of the wait

1. Waiting molds your character. Sometimes our character cannot sustain the next season and in the wait is where God builds our Character.
2. Waiting Rooms give us the opportunity to reflect God in a setting that is less desirable. It takes a special person to love the unlovable, and to reflect Christ when they feel abandoned themselves. But its in these moments where God can really use us.
3. The Waiting room strips away "self" and can be easily mistaken of stripping us of vision.
Truth is we are being stripped of is our vision. Many times what we see is not what God see's and in order for us to move forward we need new eyes.

Though waiting is the worst, waiting is what is needed to move forward. And even though at times I (you) feel like we haven't taken a step, God is making strides on our behalf.

So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. Galatians 6:9

So the lesson for today kids is that the wait refines your passion.

April 2010: Album Vlog

2010-04-19T16:05:00.005-04:00

Get Connected

2010-03-29T01:54:00.001-04:00

Free Downloads

2010-03-28T21:03:00.000-04:00

Hey Guys,
Unfortunetly there have been some unforseen set backs, and delays with the upcoming album. Because you guys have been so awesome and supportive during this process here are 2 free downloads from the last album. Enjoy.

Part 1: Passion has NO halfway mark

2010-03-26T23:11:00.002-04:00

I am a pretty passionate person. I love fully and there isn't a whole lot of middle ground. So when things go awry, or when the unknown replaces the certain ( which has happened more then I can even count ) I have had to learn how to find a middle ground. Even in moments where I struggle my heart aches because my faith and passion for Christ burns and It won't turn off, even though I try to turn it off.

The last week, even though my flesh wants to hideaway, I've made myself stay in the word . ( which is very difficult for me) I've been studying the life of Joseph. If anyone had some seriously sketchy stuff happen to him, Joseph really is the poster child. As I studied his life I realized he never really questioned God, he didn't blame God, and he never quit on God.

Part 1: Questioning God

I am sure at some point he was like, "SERIOUSLY, GOD!?". He was a human being. But when I say question, I mean a sassy questioning kinda like Job did. If you read the story of Job you'll find God spoke to Job pretty sternly about questioning Him. As I read about Job and mediated on Joseph I felt a bit frustrated...I have recently found myself in the midst of a massive detour, and I really just want to scream at the heavens, "AGAIN? REALLY!". But if I have learned anything through Joseph, and Job I know the outcome is always better then the temporal desire of us as humans.

I imagine Joseph in prison ( in my mind its a prison like the Chateau Dif, like in the Count of Monte Cristo ) and he was favored among all the others and God used him in that prison. God used Joseph's gifting IN A PRISON! And that moment was just one of the many things God used to eventually bring forth to save his people from famine...

So I hope no matter what prison you find yourself in that you know no matter the setting, God can and will totally use you for amazing things. Be patient, one day like Job things will be restored and like Joseph your life purpose is bigger then you can even imagine.

Staggering on through the impossible ( thanks Trish ),
Chari

My Life is screaming...

2010-03-17T15:42:00.001-04:00

....the question is, "what is my life screaming to the world"? In this moment my life is screaming...what it is screaming is a bit tangled and discombobulated. My hope is that those in hearing distance hear my heart and my desire for more of God, but I fear that is not the case on most days. I've spent the last five years chipping away at negative aspects of my life and attempting to run full speed towards the goal that is Christ. I won't lie, I've taken "smoke breaks" and have walked most of the way but the race has continued and my desire to chase something more has still been my driving force. But what do we do when that amazing shout our heart lifts as praise to our saviour turns into that annoying yell that Loyd Christmas screams, in Dumb and Dumber? You know which noise i'm talking about, the most annoying sound ever! What happens when our excitement for all that God is doing becomes stagnant and all the things we saw moving forward have shattered or have broken along the way...and you're just there...treading water...

The Answer: "Just keep Swimming!" ~Dori

You can't drowned if you just keep swimming. You can't sink if you just keep swimming. So You move forward you see the good in the bad, and the beauty in the darkness. You seek God, though you can't see wear the heck your next step is...

Those who know your name will trust in you. For you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.
Psalms 9:10

Found it!

2010-02-15T23:53:00.002-05:00

I am in constant search for my purpose. I long to know God's will in my life. I'm such a royal screw up, that's right I am, that if I stop searching It's very easy for me to become upset at the things I cannot fix or move forward and I just fade in the backdrop. Every day I can make a list of my failures, and how I've fallen short. I'm a walking disaster.

For example... Just today:
1. I slept 2 hours last night cause I wasn't feeling well so I spent the whole day angry and mean.
2. I definitely reached my sketchy word quota today! I think I went over..
3. there were maybe 10 different situations where i should have been Christ-like and instead totally acted like a big baby...
4. i've allowed certain situations to stress me out beyond belief to where its making me physically ill!
( my inner sanity is screaming at me, " SERIOUSLY! Get a hold of yourself." I am sure if my inner sanity was a person they would slap me like they slapped the lady in the movie airplane! hahaha" )

and that is just today, february 15, 2010.

Tonight as I was reading my Bible I came across something i've read maybe 50 times and it never clicked.

^"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

So im in search of what God wants in my life, right? Well, there it is...

1. BE JOYFUL ALWAYS: How about not allowing my flesh and stupid situations steal my joy! I have so many thing to be joyful about. I just celebrated 6 years married to most amazing man ever, I have an amazing job and career! I have an amazing family and Awesome friends and a life giving church! Dude Its a Win all around!
2. PRAY CONTINUALLY: So all God wants is to hear me and hang out with me? Well that's easy.
If only I spent less time being a psycho workaholic and on my facebook then maybe God would just blow my mind with a verse i've read 50 times before! JESUS WIN!
3. GIVE THANKS IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES: Okay so I don't do this very well. I'm a whiner! I'm an EPIC WHINER! So tomorrow i'm gonna try to work this one out....

Well there you have it folks...."God's will for you in Christ Jesus.."

Please Jesus, Help me do this right...

~Chari

Chasing The Unknown

2010-01-12T22:54:00.001-05:00

Another year has come and gone and where 2009 the goal was set and accomplished, in 2010 I am faced with the unknown. I am staring at the things I can't control and its been a bit nerve racking, I won't lie.

Last Year I set a goal to not miss what God had for me. I ran non-stop through the year and finished a book, started my business, and completed my first nationally released album that will be released soon. This year I have found the first three weeks to be very quiet. The craziness has subsided and I've been forced to stop running. Forced to stop and listen and reevaluate. My goal this year is to not hesitate and look back. I want to continue to allow God to use my life in whatever capacity that is. This year I am going to continue to chase the unknown and do it without questions.

-Chari

Remedy Drive (my thoughts)

2009-12-20T08:10:00.010-05:00

This is my New Favorite Band.

They are called "Remedy Drive". I stumbled upon them one night on the church channel. To my surprise I was pretty shocked how awesome they were and it renewed my love for Christian Music, which for the last decade has been a bit lack luster. I was blessed to see them the other night live and I was blown away. This is an artists artist! Their lyrics are awesome and the fluidity of the band was suberb, and makes your heart literally beat outside your chest! THEIR SHOW WAS BANANAS! Not sure if it was the lead singers acrobatics or the fact that these four brothers were one of the best bands I've seen in an extremely long time, I was totally moved. Very Humble guys (I was able to meet David the lead singer and piano player, who came out and talked to the fans in line, as they waited in the cold. I also met Paul the youngest brother and an amazing guitar player).

Buy this album its great.

- Check out their Video for their single , "Daylight"

Music to my ears...music to my soul...

2009-12-07T00:49:00.006-05:00

Christmas is coming and i'll tell you im not a big holidays person.

I'm not a alot of things person if that makes sense...

Excited about this year that is coming and grateful for this amazing productive year that has raced past me...This Christmas Esteban and I have decided to give each other music for Christmas. We bought a new "family Ipod" and revamped our Itunes. So i've been blessed with some new tunes.

I thought I'd share quickly some amazing new and old music i've been listening too. So if your looking for gift ideas or just something awesome these albums are stellar.

1. Switchfoot "Hello Hurricane"

2. John Mayer "Where the Light is: live in L.A."

3. Foo Fighters "Greatest hits"

4. Gloria Estefan "90 Millas"

5. Joy Williams " One of those Days EP"

Happy Listening...Chari

2 a.m. ramblings.....Sleep is over rated!

2009-11-27T05:15:00.000-05:00

DISCLAIMER: I AM ON A LOT OF MEDS!!!

Haven't slept much lately.

Tonight Im awake due to my bronchitis and this stupid cough that keeps making my asthma flair up. The stupidity of all this being sick nonsense is Im always working and never resting and I have horrible eating habits and never exercise! So once or twice a year I get bronchitis or pneumonia, cus i "supposedly" have an unhealthy lifestyle called "WORKING". BEING SICK IS STUPID!

This constant lack of running myself dry has now led to my lungs having scar tissue on it! So im supposed to take this preventive asthma medicine that I never take! Why not you might ask...well cause i forgot to and then just stopped!

SO..im awake sitting in the living room, can't breathe and my cat just farted on me... Esteban is asleep.

I've always been a person that could sleep through anything. I can sleep through storms, and people screaming, and the TV being on, and lately the rat who lives in my attic has been having keg parties and I just sleep right through em. But these last couple nights seems like my body sleeps but my mind won't. Maybe its the holidays, and the reality that this year is coming to and end? Maybe its its all the drastic changes in my life...Not sure....but every year around this time im usually pretty sick and wondering if where im at in this world is where im supposed to be.

Im 28...I've chased a lot of dreams and this coming year i might just catch it.
This coming year i might actually join the list of those who have tasted the unknown...

So this thanksgiving weekend im thinking the thing im most thankful for is "the dream".

I dreamed of love and God gave me Esteban.

I dreamed of my giftings being used in a away beyond my own imagination and last week I was able to be part of an amazing team that touches thousands.

Dreams are where its at.

I'd rather have lived this life with a dream and fail, then to have never dreamed at all.

I guess that's what makes this life livable....dreams

"But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness,

and all these things shall be added to you."

Matthew 6:33

-chari

What Inspired the Album...

2009-11-19T09:36:00.000-05:00

Many things inspired this upcoming album titled, WHO I AM. But the album is dedicated to the students i taught last year. Their lives inspired me, and being a part of their everyday made me a better person and gave me hope in the midst of my chaotic existence...

This inspires the album:

Album Update

2009-11-14T19:01:00.000-05:00

The Album is almost done....We record vocals tomorrow (11|15) and finish up Monday (11|16) with Lindsey Vartanian and Matt Adcox adding the final touches. We are looking for a early 2010 release...So late Jan. or early Feb.

More info soon will be up about the CD release and where you can get tickets for the show.

I won't lie its a bit overwhelming knowing this all coming to an end and the next chapter is on the verge of beginning.

The website charise.org has just been revamped, and the book is nearly done....

Im very much in awe of all this...

-Chari

This is me trying to put a pot roast in the microwave.

2009-06-23T14:50:00.001-04:00

I've always been a person the rushed through everything. I've lived 27 years like this: I wake up throw what ever is clean on, brush my teeth, stare at my hair and think its okay i'll wear a hat. When mowing the lawn i run everything over, i never clear out the lawn or even bother looking. I drive fast and if it fits in the microwave then i nook it! A dear friend sat me down recently and said you go so fast you don't enjoy your life....

I know Im a million miles an hour. I can design a site, listen to music, all while making dinner, washing clothes, talking on the cell phone, and as i'm running through my day I don't enjoy it. Im constantly waiting to live my life. I'm waiting for the next big thing. The next season....that one season i've been waiting for for 10 years.

And a bout a month ago I just stopped running things over. I just stopped. I woke up on my 28th birthday and I looked in the mirror and thought what have I been waiting on. I spent my birthday at The Shine Conference and just felt like all that i had been running over and rushing through were life lessons, character builders i missed. So i just stopped trying to do it all. And I gave it back to God. Here...i don't want it anymore unless your in it. So be it.....life please begin.

I stopped asking, and wondering and just sat still. I just sat still.
And everday God just started to show me, move me, I'd hear watch that, speak these words...

i've been an emotional head case ever since.

So i sit here 28 and exactly where im supposed to be. Hanging off a cliff, with nothing attached ready too jump. No agenda, dreams given back to the one who gave them to me and ready for whatever is next....

humbled.

I'm ready now.........

-chari

The women in my life.....

2009-01-25T08:29:00.000-05:00

I'm 27. A wife of almost 5 years (feb 14th) and i can truthfully say the most influential woman in my life up to about a year ago was my amazing mother. I say she is amazing because when i was little i was very sick and she never gave up hope i would be healed. And when we were young and had no money and our car had no heater as we drove to school in the Michigan winter she would sing us songs so we would forget how hungry and cold we were....my mother is amazing....a dreamer to the core.

But about a year ago i found myself in a very unfamiliar place where i felt quite alone and uncertain about my future or whether the calling i knew God has placed upon my life was ever really going to happen. In this year i was literally stripped of everything i ever thought i was and i felt the most forsaken. It's to date the darkest moments of my life, i won't elaborate... i'm not in a place where i feel led to share about those moments....i'll just say i'm grateful to be looking back and seeing how God brought me out of it. Maybe one day ill share that....i'm just not there yet....

But today as i sit drinking my starbucks in the empty kitchen of my home church i find myself thinking of the women God has placed before me this past year. The women God placed in my life in this season so i wouldn't feel like i was alone or walking this life with no direction or examples. So i want to take this opportunity to tell you (whoever you might me) who these amazing lighthouses for me are. They are in no particular order.....

Melissa Johnson:
This is a person who never lets me get away with anything. I mean i try, i won't lie. But she just calls me out on EVERYTHING, and in the greatest way.....with love. She is my reminder that the dream is possible and the tears are totally worth it.

Linda Riddle:
Ever had someone in your life who just see's past your BS? Linda is my BS meter. She will just say something to me, speak into my life in such a way and it always seems to just pierce my heart and always end up making me feeling like OMG she knows!? I want to be like the Jesus in Linda. She is the coolest person i have ever met and in the lonliest moments of the last year, God used her to harass me via email....and every time i would read her emails i would just cry and be like man if she only knew how screwed up i was..and alone i felt...every time i see her i just want to hug her and be like, " you helped save me....and you don't even know it!".... and then i'd cry like an idiot...cus i've become a crier in secret .....shhhh don't tell.

Pastor Kerri:
This woman is kind of my hero. Even though i feel like every time i have any kind of moment with her i totally make myself look like an IDIOT she always smiles and makes me feel important. And during the year where i spent trying to hide from church...and when i actually came but just tried to be invisible..she would stop me and say "we've missed you", or "where ya been?"...and when i finally dragged myself totally broken back to church, her words were always encouraging and made me want to be a better person & a better wife. She will always be my reminder that
1. God entrusted me with his call
2. Empowered me with the strength to persevere through the storm
3. Chose me even though i am unworthy of it all
4. and more than anything that he looks upon me and calls me Beloved.

Thank you Pastor Kerri...you just wrote the title track to my upcoming album....

Heather Lester:
One day when i become a mother i hope that i can be a mother like heather. Her kids are amazing and she is so awesome. And more than anything she understands me. I can tell heather anything and she just understands my heart. And that is so rare to find.

My LindseyStar:
The only person besides my beautiful husband.....who really knows who i am. She knows me. She knows the worst parts and the best parts. She knows my songs, and is able to see through my tears and understands my ramblings, and incoherent thoughts. She is my dearest friend and one day the godmother to my children. Her songs make me cry and want to leave my heart on the altar. And in my darkest moments i would think of her and how she survived things no one should be able to survive and she still worships God in Spirit and in truth. She's my LindseyStar, my lighthouse, and if i were Jonathan she would be my David.

And so i guess i'll leave this blog saying i'm grateful. I'm, grateful for my husband who puts up with me and always makes me feel beautiful even though im constantly saying...i need to loose weight. I'm thankful for my family...who even though they're totally nuts they've helped shape who i am. I amazed God gave me these women to help mold me in this moment in my life and im thankful this fasting season im not fasting from the church, but for the first time im becoming part of the body Christ in a way i never new possible.

-Chari
"every bone in my body, Lord it cries Holy. every thread of my being, Lord it cries, Holy!"